Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child
Studies have shown that emotional intelligence has benefits that will last a lifetime. According to Verywell Family, a higher EQ is linked to a higher IQ. Higher EQ is also reported to lead to better relationships, improved mental health, and high EQ in childhood can be linked to higher success as an adult. You may be seeing all of these benefits and wonder, “What can I do to help raise my child’s EQ?” The good news is that EQ can be taught.
Here are some ways from Verywell Family to help raise your child’s EQ:
1. Label your child’s emotions. Help them to identify what emotion they are feeling. Sometimes children do not know the names of the emotions they are feeling. When we give names to their emotions, we are opening up their ability to share how they feel as well as recognize how others may be feeling.
2. Show empathy. While it may be tempting to downplay or minimize your child’s big feelings, it teaches them that their feelings are wrong. Instead, validate their feelings and show them empathy. Their Lego creation getting messed up may seem trivial when there are much bigger issues going on in life, but in their world that creation was very important. By showing them that you understand how they are feeling, they will be more willing to share their feelings with you instead of showing you through behaviors.
3. Model appropriate ways to express emotions. Children need to learn how to express their emotions in a socially acceptable way. Our children learn from watching us, so we need to model for them appropriate ways to express our feelings. Talk about feelings in everyday life. Studies show that emotionally intelligent parents are more likely to raise more emotionally intelligent children.
4. Teach healthy coping skills. Once children can identify their emotions, they need to learn how to deal with them. Teach them specific coping strategies to regulate their emotions, such as deep breathing when they are angry or upset or activities that can help them calm down like coloring.
5. Develop problem solving skills. After your child’s feelings have been identified and dealt with, they need to address the problem that caused their feelings. Identify the problem with them and then come up with possible solutions. Come up with several solutions then pick the best option. If your child made a mistake, discuss what they could have done differently and what they should do in the future. Help them to come up with these answers instead of just telling them. This will help them develop problem solving skills.
6. Make Emotional Intelligence an ongoing goal. Children are constantly growing and will continue to face more challenges as they grow. No matter how emotionally intelligent a child is, there is always room for growth. Make it a goal to continually work on growing your child’s emotional intelligence. Use mistakes as learning opportunities. Discuss how they can handle similar situations differently in the future.
