The Importance of Perspective Taking
Do you ever consider how another person may feel after something you said? Do you ever consider what another may think after something you did? As adults, we have acquired the skills and the ability to engage in these behaviors when solving conflicts with others or during our daily interactions. This is perspective taking. It is the ability to be able to consider what another may be thinking or feeling and respond accordingly.
To be viewed as a considerate person, one needs to think of another’s perspective prior to speaking and/or acting. When there is lack of consideration for how our behaviors might affect another, then one might be viewed as inconsiderate. So, we can see how this would lead to a child having difficulty with making friends, getting along with peers, being part of a team, etc.
So, it is an important life skill to develop. It usually develops naturally by learning through life experiences. However, at times it may need to be directly taught. It is helpful for one to be able to imagine oneself having the same experience as another, using one’s own similar past experiences to understand another’s situation, and possibly applying general knowledge about how one might respond based on how others have previously responded to see another’s perspective. There are also specific ways to teach this skill too.
Here are some ways to teach this important life skill:
Model the behavior: Young children learn from watching others, so when you show the skill, it is easier for them to learn it. It may be helpful to share your thought process on the situation as well (i.e. your perspective on the situation and how the other person may see the situation).
Talk about difficult feelings: Validate all your child’s feelings, positive and negative! Children will better understand others’ perspectives when their feelings, thoughts, and experiences are being seen and heard.
Show understanding: Demonstrate to your child that you understand their perspective by repeating it back to them, so they felt heard and understood.
Respect different opinions: Show that respecting and understanding another’s perspective does not need to mean that you agree with their perspective, but that it is acknowledging the person’s thoughts and feelings and what they may need or want.
Teach how actions impact others: Take advantage of opportunities to teach your child about how their behavior may impact another person. As well as how others’ behaviors may be impacting people as well. This will help to build understanding between people’s behaviors and motivations.
The power of observation: Share the benefits of observing others and evaluating others’ behaviors. Teach them clues that will help them learn about others’ behavior (i.e. body language, facial expressions, etc.)
Encourage collaboration and teamwork: Working with others will naturally teach children to think about others’ perspectives when having to collaborate and problem solve with a team.
To find out more, including the results of children improving their perspective taking skills, please visit: https://www.sociallyskilledkids.com/perspective-taking/.
